I ordered the maps off the OS website. OS Explorer 1:25,000 scale. Proper paper maps. Cannot wait to get my hands on them in 3 to 5 business days.

You need six of this type of map to cover the Tweed from source to mouth, namely:

• Moffat & St. Mary’s Loch,
• Biggar & Broughton,
• Peebles & Innerleithen,
• Galashiels, Selkirk & Melrose,
• Kelso, Coldstream & Lower Tweed Valley and, of course,
• Berwick-upon-Tweed.

I’ll be reasonably familiar with the stretch from west of Peebles to Melrose, but the others will be fertile exploration territory.

And I made some improvements to the website. I recognise that perfect is the enemy of good. And this website is not likely to be particularly good, never mind perfect. So I won’t spend more than a couple more days on it before I publish, I promise.

I’ve also been trying to homeschool my kids. I have three children, girls aged 10 and 7 and a 4-year-old boy. So, Primary 5, 3 and pre-school respectively. They are wonderful human beings and the world is unquestionably a richer and more interesting place for their being in it. But my goodness, they really test my patience sometimes.

Kids these days (yes, you read that right, I said kids these days. I am working towards getting the full suite of Dadisms. “Yeah, well life’s not fair.” “Maybe so.” “You have no idea how lucky you are.” I’m not quite at “tough titties” yet, but I sense it is not far off)… where was I, oh yes, kids these days.

Kids these days have entertainment on tap. It is their god-given right as a paid-up member of the human race to be amused as and when required. They have on-tap access to every TV programme ever broadcast. To every song every recorded. And, of course, to the world wide web, which has unlimited dog photos for those who wish to seek them out. So they get very impatient if the next fix of fun isn’t immediately injected into their veins as soon as the last one wears off.

“Daddy, what can we do?” is a common utterance in our house. And, dear reader, I’m running out of answers.

Of course this is a familiar tale. Not necessarily old as time – I can’t imagine cave-children pestering their parents for a fresh stick or a different flavoured wolf to play with every 5 minutes – but certainly not new. And my reaction to it is not unique. I project their impatience and dissatisfaction onto my own value as a parent (and as a stand-in teacher for the next few weeks). I am generally ok at seeing this for what it is – completely irrational, but I am tired today so my defences were down. Stern words were had, reader, voices were raised (to about 7 – I stopped short of turning it up to 11). But we all go off to bed, we say “I love you” and it will be ok in the morning.

Night, night.